When silence is used to manage conflict in an intimate partnership, misunderstanding and increased emotional distance are likely. Stonewalling in relationships can also cause one or both partners to experience anxiety or depression, and may lead ultimately to separation.
Technology enables moms to multitask more easily but more is expected of modern parents. Even in households espousing gender equality, women tend to take on more of the childcare and household responsibilities, as well as the corresponding mental load. Dads can ease this burden by taking more initiative and following through.
Being on your phone instead of listening when your partner is speaking as well using phones and cameras to monitor your partner’s activities are examples of how technology enters relationships. Our phones and other devices can interfere with intimacy and also help us avoid difficult conversations.
Motherhood is often not what we understood or imagined it would be based upon our observations of our own mothers. While growing up, we often failed to see the behind the scenes work and effort that we now experience first hand.
Feelings of sadness rather than joy may be dominating your days if this is your first holiday season following a divorce. Or maybe you’ve been telling yourself that you’re “over it” and the holiday blues have taken you a bit by surprise. Either way, getting through the holiday season is a milestone in your divorce recovery.
Participating in parenting coordination with your co-parent may not sound like something that you really want to do. However, unless one or both co-parents have unlimited funds and find ongoing conflict in the Court rewarding in some way, you and your co-parent eventually have to start doing the work of raising your children together after the separation even though you are no longer committed as a couple.
In the course of negotiating a Parenting Plan or Marital Settlement Agreement (“Agreement”) all of the holidays are usually discussed in turn and divided in some manner. Negotiating the holiday schedule can be a challenging part of divorce mediation. Giving some careful thought to preferences and potential areas for compromise beforehand can be helpful.
In Parenting Coordination trained professional mediates the conversations between co-parents who have difficulty communicating or complying with existing Agreements and Court Orders. Parenting Coordinators also serve as a resource outside the court system in the event that new conflicts and issues arise.
When you first separate, and you or soon-to-be Ex files for divorce, it can seem like things are moving very quickly. But it can take a year or more for your case to wind its way through the court system. Without ongoing support, you may become frustrated and start to believe “the Judge should decide.”
